In the US, 70% to 90% of women answer yes to this question. This is especially interesting as more than 60% of them identify themselves as feminists at the same time.
Let's take a look back at where this tradition is from. The tradition originated from coverture laws dating back to the 9th century. Under the coverture law, women did not have any legal rights and were considered property of their husbands. It was not until the 1970s that all the states in the US eliminated the law that requires a woman to assume the last name of her husband.
Then It becomes more clear what it means to change one's last name - it means women are giving up part of their identity and becoming the belonging of their husbands. One reason this is particularly shocking is that a large part of the world which might be perceived as "less" progressive by Americans operates in another way. Countries such as Greece, France, and Italy forbid changing maiden names. In some other countries such as Malaysia and South Korea, there is not a law discussing this as people don't even think it's a problem that needs discussion - nobody is changing maiden names. In China, the hottest debate is whether children should take their mother's last name instead of their father's. If you interview most woman in those areas about whether she would like to change her last name to her husband's, she would be shocked that you even ask.
One common reason mentioned by both men and women for why women change their last name in the US is logistics ("the hotel will know we are from a family when checking in"). Some may also argue this is a symbol of love. Here is my suggestion: how about letting the husband take the wife's last name? Problem solved. You might find it funny though it was not intended to be a joke.
More likely it's about social pressure. As some more clearly put it, "You don't just have to be a good family, you have to be seen to be a good family by other people." However, social norms are formed by individuals, and my Kellogg people, I know you come to Kellogg aspiring to be brave leaders. It's understandable that the pressure of breaking social norms could be daunting. However, at least we should be aware of what we are actually giving up when we give up maiden names and think through what we are doing it for.
Written by: Cen Chen
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