Is he being sweet? You might probably say yes. However, this kind of care can be received as microaggression. Repeating instructions in a condescending way as if others are not capable of learning it themselves is typical behavior of mansplaining. This term refers to the situation when a man tries to explain something to a woman which he does not necessarily know more about, typically in a condescending or patronizing way.
People might ask, what is the difference between mansplaining and explanation? The line can be subtle, but fortunately, we already have a tool to check if we are being mansplaining:
Why is mansplaining so common in our life? There are several reasons, though fundamentally it reflects an imbalance in the power structure. One of the reasons might be the inflated sense of importance resulting from being born in a dominant group, males. Another might be the influence of a patriarchal narrative that a male needs to be more capable than a female to win her heart. Pop culture tends to depict male characters who are molders of a younger woman (such as My Fair Lady), which reinforces a tendency for some males to choose a partner as their sounding board. Not ironically, there is another term that reflects racial inequity called whitesplaining.
What do we do? Awareness is the first step. As an ally, we can watch out for our tone and call it out when seeing others doing that. Relax man, nowadays women prefer nice guys to Mr. who-knows-it-all.
Written by: Cen Chen